Christmas is the season of giving, and for most there is great simplicity to wrapping up a present, sliding it under the tree and waiting for that moment of uninhibited joy when their loved one reveals their new socks.
Or it could be your son who has for weeks has had visions of Ninja Turtles dancing in his head opening his new pajamas.
Gifting can be a minefield, and it is not just making sure you are getting what the person wants or needs. There are considerations of finance, relationships, tastes and all of these stresses begin even before the mall.
In fact, sometimes they begin when you already have the present in hand, and you know it is perfect. Why? Because last Christmas someone gave it to you.
You may have already have one of the items, or maybe it didn’t fit. For one reason or another it is in the closet and still has Scotch Tape residue.
To regift or not to regift that is the question?
Marina Flater admits to regifting.
“If it is something I can’t necessarily use or I have multiples of that you can regift, but you don’t make a big deal about it, and you don’t tell the whole world, because the person who gave it to you feels good because they gave you a gift, and the person you give it to feels good,” said Flater.
She has a few rules. One is you never regift something from your mother. Another is if you can’t use the item and then regift it.
“You have to have a good heart and do it for the right reasons. If I got a gift, and I knew someone else could use it more than me,” said Flater.
Shannon Dart says she never regifts. Her feelings are that it takes away the meaning of the gift.
But if it is something she won’t use, she pays it forward in a way.
“I usually give a lot of it to Greentree School’s White Elephant Sale,” said Dart.
Tammi Garbutt says she has regifted.
“I can’t think of an example off the top of my head, but yes, if I have a duplicate on something, yes,” said Garbutt. “If it is still sealed, then absolutely.”
She has no qualms about taking an item back to the store straight away either.
“Maybe you get something from someone who just doesn’t know you and if they have given you a gift receipt with it, then I see that as permission to take it back, exchange it and get what you want,” said Garbutt.
Dart agrees and has returned gifts.
“We don’t want to say we don’t like it, we smile and say thank-you. It might be a duplicate, or we might have it, or it doesn’t fit. I find more and more gifts have receipts with them,” said Dart.
Another tough spot to be put in is when a neighbour comes to the door with a present, and you had no plans of doing the same.
Flater said she would reciprocate if there was enough time. She’s not about to bake a new batch of cookies on Christmas Eve, however.
Dart said if a neighbour brings over a gift, she feels obligated to return the favour.
“Maybe not the next day, but within the week,” said Dart.
Another minefield is the annual Christmas gift exchange. What do you do when, for example, you have an exchange with family or coworkers, and one of the ground rules is a dollar limit on the gifts. Do these include sale prices? If there is a $50 limit and you find a $50 pair of gloves on sale for $20, are you done shopping?
For Flater she soldiers along in the mall to spend as much of the limit as she can.
Dart also agrees that you keep shopping.
“I just try to think of the other person,” said Dart.
Garbutt also keeps shopping.
“I would throw in a box of chocolates,” she said.
The one other conundrums that many face is the gifts to teachers. It may seem that even as pure the intent may be, can teachers really take home and keep 25 toilet paper roll and macaroni art “World’s Greatest Teacher” crafts.
Dart is a teacher, and taught most of her career at the junior high level, and admits as kids get older the presents drop in number. And while it seems that it would be difficult to keep everything, Dart says she cherishes them all.
“I can’t speak for all teachers, but the gifts I got meant a lot to me, so I would sign the back with the date and who gave it to me and keep them,” she said. “I think it is the thought that counts.”
Flater says consumables are the way to go for teachers.
“Chocolate, wine, Tylenol… always consumables…but don’t sent wine to school with the kids!” said Flater.
